Manners

Manners and politeness work differently across cultures, which makes this a fascinating topic for conversation classes. These questions explore everything from table etiquette to social expectations in different situations.

Questions are organized by level from beginner to advanced. A printable PDF of all the questions is available at the bottom of the page.

Beginner (A1-A2)

1. Do you know someone who is often rude? What kinds of things do they do?
2. What are some polite things to say when you meet someone? Give me some examples.
3. Who has the best manners in your family? What kinds of things do they do?
4. What do you say when someone gives you a gift? What do you do?
5. When you eat at someone’s house, what do you do to be polite? Do you bring anything?
6. What do people in your country do when they greet each other? (Handshake, bow, kiss, hug, etc.)
7. Do you hold the door open for people behind you? What do they usually do?
8. What are three polite things you can do at a restaurant?
9. What are some rude things to do when you are eating with other people?
10. Is it polite or rude to be late in your country? How many minutes late is okay?

Elementary (A2)

1. What are some examples of bad manners on the bus?
2. What are some examples of good manners on the subway, in a restaurant, or in a cafe?
3. What are some examples of bad manners that you HATE?
4. Do you take off your shoes when you go into someone’s home? Is it the same in every home you visit?
5. Have you ever been to a fancy restaurant? What manners did you have to use there?
6. Have you ever been embarrassed by someone’s bad manners? What happened?
7. Have you ever accidentally been rude to someone? What happened?
8. What’s the rudest thing you’ve ever seen someone do in public?
9. Have you ever made a manners mistake in another country or culture? What did you do wrong?
10. What manners did your parents or teachers care about the most when you were growing up? Why?
11. Have you ever corrected someone’s bad manners? What did you say?

Intermediate (B1)

1. Do you think people are more polite or less polite now than in the past? Why or why not?
2. Can you think of some examples of how manners have changed in your country?
3. How are manners different in other countries?
4. When someone is rude in a public place, do you say something or try to ignore the person?
5. Do you think children have good manners or bad manners these days? Why?
6. Do you prefer formal manners or casual manners? Why?
7. What manners do people need to have when they use their phone in public? Why?
8. Do you prefer people who are very direct or people who are very polite? Why?
9. What is the most important table manner in your country? Why is it important?
10. Should parents punish children for bad manners, or is it better to explain why something is rude? Why or why not?
11. Do you think manners at work are different from manners with friends? How so?
12. If you could add one new rule of manners that everyone had to follow, what would it be and why?
13. Do you think people are ruder online than they are in person? Why or why not?
14. When someone is rude to a waiter or a shop worker, what does that tell you about them?
15. Should restaurants and stores be allowed to refuse service to rude customers? Why or why not?
16. Do you think manners are more about respect or more about following traditions? Why or why not?
17. Is it rude to look at your phone while someone is talking to you? Is it common in your country or culture?
18. Some people say that being too polite can actually be dishonest. What do you think about that idea?
19. Manners often differ between generations, older people may find things rude that younger people consider normal. How do you navigate those differences in your own life?

Upper-Intermediate (B2)

1. How important is it to be polite to older people, even if they aren’t polite to you? Why or why not?
2. What is something that isn’t considered rude but should be?
3. What are some situations where being too polite can be a problem? When might it backfire?
4. Do you think tipping is a good system, or should workers just be paid more? What is good about each?
5. How has social media changed what people consider polite or rude? What do you think about those changes?
6. How do differences in manners between cultures lead to misunderstandings? Can you give an example from your own experience?
7. What role do manners play in professional success? How much do they actually matter compared to skills and qualifications?
8. How do expectations about manners differ between men and women in your country? Is that changing?
9. When a company from one country does business in another country, whose manners should they follow? What problems can come up?
10. Compare how children learn manners today versus how children learned them 50 years ago. What has changed and why?
11. How do economic class differences affect expectations about manners? What problems does this create?
12. How has the idea of ‘good manners’ changed in the last 20 years? What do you think caused those changes?
13. How is politeness different in face-to-face conversations compared to online communication? What causes those differences?
14. Some workplaces are very casual now, people call their boss by their first name and wear whatever they want. What do you think gets lost and what gets gained when formality disappears?
15. People often say ‘manners cost nothing,’ but following social rules actually takes a lot of effort and self-control. What are some situations where being polite is genuinely difficult, and is it always worth the effort?

Advanced (C1)

1. In many cultures, politeness requires people to say things they don’t actually mean, like ‘We should get together sometime’ or ‘I’m fine.’ Does this kind of polite dishonesty make society work better or does it create distance between people?
2. When someone from a wealthy country criticizes the manners or customs of another culture, how do you tell the difference between genuine concern and cultural arrogance?
3. Children today are often taught to speak up, question authority, and express their feelings, but in many cultures, that behavior is considered disrespectful. How should parents handle this conflict?
4. Why do people sometimes get angrier about small rudeness, like someone not saying ‘thank you,’ than about much bigger problems? What does that say about how we think about manners?
5. In the age of social media, people are sometimes publicly shamed for bad manners or rude behavior. When does calling out bad behavior become bullying, and who gets to decide?
6. Some people argue that strict manners and etiquette were originally created to separate social classes, to show who was ‘refined’ and who wasn’t. Do you think manners still serve that purpose today?
7. As countries become more diverse through immigration and globalization, whose version of ‘polite’ should be the standard? Is it even possible to have one?
8. Parents often teach children to be polite, but children quickly notice that adults don’t always follow the same rules. How does this gap between what adults say and what they do affect how children learn about manners?
9. Some manners that were once considered very important, like standing when a woman enters the room or not wearing a hat indoors, have mostly disappeared. Why do some manners fade away while others survive for centuries?
10. When people travel or move to a new country, they sometimes find that their normal behavior is considered rude. Should people fully adopt the manners of their new country, or is it okay to keep their own? Where do you draw the line?

PDF: Download a PDF of all the questions