Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is one of those topics that gets students thinking beyond textbook English. It’s personal, relatable, and leads to real conversation. These questions explore self-awareness, empathy, and how we handle emotions in everyday life.

Questions are organized by level from beginner to advanced. A printable PDF of all the questions is available at the bottom of the page.

Beginner (A1-A2)

1. How do you feel when someone says something kind to you? What do you usually do?
2. What do you do when you feel nervous before something important? (A test, a speech, a meeting, etc.)
3. What kinds of things make you feel proud? How do you show it?
4. What kind of music do you listen to when you are in a bad mood? Does it change how you feel?
5. What makes you feel happy? What do you usually do when you are happy?
6. Do you have a favorite place you go when you feel sad or upset? What is it like there?
7. What is the most scared you have ever been? What happened?
8. When someone you care about is upset, what do you do to make them feel better?
9. What is the best way to cheer yourself up when you are in a bad mood?
10. Who do you go to when you need to talk about your feelings? Why that person?
11. Are you usually in a good mood or a bad mood in the morning? How does that affect your day?
12. What is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you? How did it make you feel?

Elementary (A2)

1. What is the hardest emotion for you to control? What happens when you feel that way?
2. When you are angry, what do you do to calm down? Does it work?
3. Can you tell when a friend is sad, even if they don’t say anything? How can you tell?
4. Who is the best listener you know? What makes them so good at it?
5. Do you cry easily, or is it hard for you to cry? When was the last time?
6. Have you ever stayed calm in a situation where most people would get upset? What happened?
7. Have you ever felt jealous of someone? Tell me about it.
8. When you feel lonely, what do you usually do? Does it help?
9. Have you ever been so excited about something that you couldn’t sleep? What was it?
10. What is the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you? How did you handle it?
11. Is it easy or hard for you to forgive someone who hurt your feelings? Why?
12. Have you ever surprised yourself with how you reacted to something? What happened?

Intermediate (B1)

1. Do you prefer to talk about your feelings with someone, or keep them to yourself? What’s good about your way?
2. What emotion do you find the most difficult to show in front of other people? Why?
3. Do you prefer to be around people who are calm, or people who are full of energy? Why?
4. When a friend comes to you with a problem, do you try to give advice, or do you mostly just listen? Why?
5. What do you think is the easiest emotion to fake? Why do you think so?
6. Is it easy for you to ask for help when you are struggling with something? Why or why not?
7. Do you think you are a patient person or an impatient person? Why?
8. Is it easier to understand your own feelings or other people’s feelings? Why do you think so?
9. Do you think emotional intelligence is something you are born with, or something you can learn? Why or why not?
10. Should schools teach emotional intelligence as a subject, the same way they teach math or science? Why or why not?
11. Do you think men and women are taught to handle emotions differently? Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
12. If you could change one thing about how you react to stressful situations, what would it be? Why do you think that would help?
13. Is it common in your country or culture to talk openly about mental health or emotional struggles? What do you think about that?
14. What kind of personality do you think a good therapist or counselor should have? Why are those traits important?
15. How much does your mood affect the decisions you make? Give me some examples.
16. Some people say you should always ‘think positive.’ Do you agree, or is it sometimes okay to feel negative emotions? Why do you think so?
17. How does understanding your own emotional triggers help you in difficult conversations or conflicts? What do you do differently when you are aware of them?

Upper-Intermediate (B2)

1. Do you think emotionally intelligent people make better leaders? What are the good and bad sides of leading with emotion?
2. Is it better to express your anger or hold it in? What are the good and bad sides of each?
3. How does understanding your own emotions help you in your relationships with other people? How has that affected you personally?
4. What are the advantages and disadvantages of being very open about your emotions at work? How is that different from how you behave at home?
5. How has social media changed the way people understand and express their emotions? What do you think about those changes?
6. Some people say that emotional intelligence is more important for success than academic intelligence. Do you agree? What evidence can you point to?
7. What are the benefits and drawbacks of using emotional appeals in advertising or politics? How much do they affect you personally?
8. What role do emotions play in how people make important decisions — like choosing a career, a partner, or a place to live? Do you think emotions help or hurt those decisions?
9. Compare how emotional intelligence is valued in a job interview versus on the job itself. What do you think the gap between those two tells us?
10. How has the way people express emotions changed over the past few generations? What do you think caused those changes?
11. In what ways can high emotional intelligence be a disadvantage? For example, are there situations where being too aware of other people’s feelings actually makes things harder?

Advanced (C1)

1. Some people can work in very emotional jobs — like nursing, social work, or emergency response — for years without burning out, while others struggle after just a few months. What makes the difference, and what does that tell us about how emotional resilience actually works?
2. Emotional intelligence training has become a multi-billion dollar industry, sold to corporations and schools around the world. Why do you think it has become so popular, and do you think it actually delivers what it promises?
3. When companies train their employees to use scripted empathy, saying ‘I understand your frustration’ or ‘I hear you’, does that kind of practiced emotional response still have value, or does it cheapen what genuine empathy means?
4. In many high-stakes professions — law, finance, surgery — being emotionally detached is often seen as a professional virtue. What tensions does that create, both for the professionals themselves and for the people they serve?
5. Why do we often find it easier to be emotionally generous with strangers — tipping, donating, holding doors — than with the people we are closest to? What does that reveal about how familiarity affects our emotional behavior?
6. How has the global conversation about mental health over the last decade both genuinely reduced stigma and, in some cases, created new pressures to perform vulnerability or wellness? Where do you think the line is?
7. In many cultures, men are expected to hide emotions like sadness and fear, while women are expected to hide emotions like anger. How do these unwritten rules shape people’s mental health and their relationships over time?
8. Therapy and self-help culture encourage people to constantly analyze their feelings. Is there a point where thinking about your emotions too much becomes unhealthy? Where do you draw the line?
9. When someone uses empathy to persuade or manipulate others, is that still emotional intelligence, or is it something else entirely? Where is the line between understanding people and using that understanding against them?
10. Children learn how to handle emotions mostly by watching the adults around them. But many adults never learned to manage their own emotions well in the first place. How does this cycle play out in families, and what would it take to break it?
11. Emotions can spread quickly through a group — one anxious person can make a whole room tense, or one calm person can settle everyone down. Why are emotions so contagious, and how does this play out differently in workplaces, families, and online spaces?

PDF: Download a PDF of all the questions